That night we
by HallowShark1
Summary: Kisame and Kakuzu have a 12 pac beer alone in the akatsuki hideout, and things get messy,and Konan is also pregnat with Kisame's child XD slitgt KisaKuzu, mostly KisaKonan MPreg and yoai warning.Not much romance exsept the sex OOCs
1. The Beerpal tunnel of love

Hey my first yoai fic

Hey my first yoai fic. Well here goes nothn'

Paring: KisaKaku

Anime: naruto (I don't own naruto)

Summery: There's no one in the akatsuki hideout but Kisame and Kakuzu, and when the find a 12 pack of beer, things get…um… messy. Oh, and Mpreg included

Kisame walked out of his room. 'How long have I been asleep?' he asked himself. He looked around the akatsuki hide looking for someone to hangout with.

"Itachi! Konan! Anyone!" Kisame called.

Then, he removed his forehead protector, reviling his pointed ears, on had a gold earring one had 2 gold earrings. Kisame hear is remarkable due to the shark demon being put into him. He heard the sound of the TV a few hallways away. He slipped his forehead protector on and slowly walked toward the living room.

"Hello?"

"Hum…. Oh, Kisame I thought you left with everyone else." Said a deep voice, Turing out to be Kakuzu.

"No, I don't even know where everyone else is, do you? "

"Yeah they went out to celebrate capturing the Shakaku."

"Oh, okay. Hey Listen, I just brought a twelve pack beer, want some?"

"I guess."

One hour later….

The beers are all gone and Kisame is lying on the coach and Kakuzu on the coffee table.

"The sun'll come out tohiccup marrow!" Kakuzu sang

"I'm bringn's sexy back!" Kisame sang over Kakuzu.

"Yes you are…" Kakuzu said back at him.

Kisame smiled.

" Wanna see more?" asked the drunk shark man.

Before Kakuzu could answer, Kisame had him pinned on the sofa. Kisame smiled once more, and then pressed his lips to Kakuzu's greedily thrusting his tongue into the smaller man's mouth. They both gave a lustful moan into the kiss. The kiss lasted a good five minutes and sometime in those five minutes, one of Kisame's hands landed on Kakuzu's hips and the other reached into his pant and slide across his length. Kisame continued to rub his length, which made Kakuzu gasp. Getting lustful Kisame then pulled Kakuzu's pant down. Kakuzu was already hard at this point.

Kisame then pick Kakuzu up by his arm and carried him into his bedroom. Kisame throw him on his bed, then he took his sword and unwrapped half of it and cut it. He placed it into his mouth as he climbed into the bed. He removed Kakuzu's shirt, Kisame smiled once more.  
"Get on with it DANMIT!" yelled a hard and frustrated Kakuzu. Kisame just smiled.

Then Kisame's hand slid smoothly across Kakuzu's chest while the other stroked the bulge in his boxers.

"Calm down, it'll be soon." He said softly.

Kakuzu moaned, then he felt his hands being moved above his head and tide onto the bedpost then he felt his boxers being pulled down. Kisame pulled his own shirt over his head and throw it to the floor. He sat up and pulled his pants and boxers off. Kisame spread Kakuzu's legs apart; the he opened the dresser next to the bed and grabbed a bottle of lube. He put some on three of his fingers and stuck two into Kakuzu's opening.

Kakuzu gave a hiss. It hurt a little but Kisame gave him time to get used to it, and Kakuzu loved the feeling. Then, Kisame inserted a third finger. Kakuzu held in another hiss as he felt his opening stretch. Then, he felt Kisame's fingers trust into him. He gasped, it hurt even more, but he liked this kind of pain.

Kisame removed his fingers, then, rubbed some lube onto his own member then moved his hips forward, Kakuzu closed his eyes, as Kisame's arm's wrapped around him.

Then, Kisame thrusted into him.

"F-FUCK!" he yelled

Then, Kisame grabbed his cock and began to pump it, making him wince, Kisame thrusted once more, he and Kakuzu were panting.

"God, your so tight... relax…" Kisame asked.

Then Kisame stopped, Kakuzu was still panting.

"Don't stop, p-please." Kakuzu panted. Kisame just smirked. Kakuzu growled at him.

"Don't stop!" he yelled then,

"Yeah, you want me, just checking."

Then Kisame gave the largest thrust, letting his chakra run through Kakuzu. Kakuzu screamed at the top of his lunges. He felt dizzy and couldn't see straight. He continued to pant and wince in pain and pleasure. Then, within six minutes, he came on Kisame's stomach. Kisame came a few seconds later. Then Kisame collapsed on top of Kakuzu. He stayed there for a while, and then himself pulled out of Kakuzu and rolled next to him. Kisame untied him and Kakuzu snuggled close to Kisame, who wrapped his arms around him as they gentle fell asleep.

Okay, to chapter 2!

Listen don't be so harsh on me, it's my first yoai fic. Be gentle on me. I have a heart ya know!

Comment, review and fave plez.


	2. Waking up, Lost one

Here goes

Here goes! Chapter 2, Kisame and Kakuzu wake up. Warning, men crying. Sadness.

Kakuzu keep his eyes closed, he felt a small pain in his ass. When he moved it hurt a lot. He opened his eyes.

'What happened?' he asked himself. He looked at the ceiling. Then he notices he was leaning on something warm, burly and, moving! He jumped up with a small scream. It was Kisame, he was in Kisame's bed, and Kisame was naked. So was he. Then he heard a grunt, then a groan. Kisame Sat up and gave a yawn. Then looked at Kakuzu. His jaw dropped in disbelief, and felt tears begin to form in his eyes. He looked at Kakuzu's, notice the tears going down his cheeks. He then realized it was okay to cry. Kakuzu felt many emotions at the moment, fear, sadness, disbelief and anger. He let it all show through his tears. Kisame's tears run down his cheeks and trough his gills, and down his chin. Kisame was just beating himself up right now.

'Kakuzu looks really scared. Should I…' then his thoughts were interrupted by Kakuzu standing up.

" Kakuzu, I'm sorr-" before he could finish Kakuzu was out the door, Kisame's blanket wrapped around him, and running toward his room.

"SAVE IT!" he yelled, slamming the door. Kisame's heavy eyes were now filed with many emotions.

Kakuzu sat in the corner of his room and just cried, feeling sad for himself;

'Lucky none of the other members were up yet. ' He said to himself and feel asleep in that corner.

Meanwhile….

Kisame had finished cleaning Kakuzu's cum off his stomach. He slipped his boxers on and went back to bed.

'God, I look terrible,' said to himself speaking of the refection he saw in the mirror. He graded his ipod and hooked it up to his speakers, turn to a low level. He turned it to 'Lost one' by Jay-z. After one minute into the song he felt something stroke his back. He lifted his head from his pillow and turned over. The most beautiful woman in the world was sitting on the head of his bed. Konan smiled at him and said "Hey, my big strong sharky."

He smiled and responded" Hello my paper rose. Ya know, we sound really corny, right?"

" Yeah, we do. Listen, I have to tell you some thing." Kisame responded with a "huh" sounding grunt.

" Its true, I am pregnant." She muttered, trying to keep a smile on her face. Kisame gave a real, be concerned smile. He took her hand and kissed it.

"Hey, I'm happy, really, I've always wanted a kid, by you." He pulled her into a passionate kiss. She smiled. "Well I better go tell the leaders about this."

"Okay."

"Get some rest!" she yelled.

" I know, I know."

He sat there wondering if he should have told her.

Sorry it was short, but I wanted to torcher you, MUHHAHA! Okay next time, Kisame and Kakuzu have been acting weird around each other.


	3. Pain in a misson

Chapter 3, the other members notice something weird about Kisame and Kakuzu

Chapter 3, the other members notice something weird about Kisame and Kakuzu.

--Hidan and Kakuzu--

Kakuzu woke up to knocking and a loud voice calling him. He was in the corner, Kisame's blanket still wrapped around him.

'So it wasn't a nightmare.' He said to himself.

"KAKUZU!! KAKUZU YOU BASTARD! COME ON WE GOT A FUCKING MISSION!" yelled Hidan.

He yelled like that for two more minutes, then realizing, something was wrong…

Hidan now had a concerned look on his face; he was scared at this point. Usually, Kakuzu would be pining him ageist the wall and choking him.

'Is he okay?' He asked himself.

"Kakuzu…" he said softly also knocking lightly. He tried it again.

"Kakuzu…" he asked once more before turning the knob to the room.

"NO! Don't come in, just let me get ready." Kakuzu responded.

"Oh, okay…." Hidan still had that look on his face.

'That was odd, there is definitely something wrong.'

Within five minutes Kakuzu was dressed and out his bedroom door, Hidan just stared.

The masked man had a look of dread in his eyes.

"Kakuzu, is there something wrong?" asked the albino.

Kakuzu sighed, and hesitated for a moment, and said,

"No, I'm okay." He muttered quietly, then walking down the hall.

--Kisame and Itachi--

"Kisame san, we have a miss-" Itachi stopped, he was in shock, Kisame was standing still. His jaw dropped. He's never seen Kisame this still. Never.

"Um… K-Kisame san…. Are you okay?" asked the weasel namesake. Kisame just looked at him with a sad look on his face. Kisame was now in his male blue tank top and wear his pants with a pair of leg and arm warmers.

"Yes, I'm fine." He said. He grabbed his clock and sword and left with Itachi.

--Kakuzu and Hidan's mission--

Kakuzu had the enemies pinned to the ground with his tentacles. He was still depressed and killing people didn't help much. He frowned so hard that Hidan could see it through his mask.

'There is something wrong with him. He isn't smiling. He isn't even wise cracking.'

Then, Kakuzu felt a sharp unbearable pain in his ass. He collapsed; the only thing holding him up was Hidan. His tentacles subsided, one hit Hidan in the face.

"FUCK!" Hidan yelled, a deep cut in his face, almost hitting his eye. He knew Kakuzu didn't mean it. He didn't laugh.

"Kakuzu, w-what's wrong?"

Kakuzu couldn't answer; he was in too much pain. Hidan reached into his own pocket, and took out his special painkillers. He grabbed one of the canteens from there bags and gave them to Kakuzu. He took two himself. And recaptured all the enemies while Kakuzu rested.

Okay, this one was the best so far!! Poor Kuzu-Kun ;; Anyway

Next Time: Kisame and Kakuzu tell!

WTF!!


	4. Coming clean,bleed it out

Okay, what to say… AIN'T NO LOVE IN THE HEART OF THE CITY

Okay, what to say… AIN'T NO LOVE IN THE HEART OF THE CITY! NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA! Okay XD Now that of got that out of my system (that's my fave song by Jay-z) Lets get on with it!

--A month and a half later. --

" Were telling you there is something fuckn' wrong with them!" Hidan yelled at the leader.

"Hidan, calm down. What Hidan is saying is, we've notice weird behavior-"

"And physical!"

"Well Hidan, that's Kakuzu, not Kisame. Kisame's physical fitness is fine, he's just been acting really odd for the past month or so." Itachi continued.

" Yeah, about a mouth ago, Kakuzu collapsed right in the middle of a mission, the fucker gave me the scare on my face, it almost fuckn' hit my EYE!" Hidan yelled.

The leader gave a sigh,

"Fine, bring them here." He asked.

Itachi and Hidan went on to get their partners.

'This might interfere with our plans.' The leader thought to himself. Moments later, Kisame and Kakuzu appear in two clouds of smoke in his office. Kisame gasped when he saw Kakuzu. Kakuzu just shot Kisame an evil glare.

"Yes Leader sama." Kisame reported. They both weren't wearing their cloaks; only they're male blue tank tops (Kakuzu's is actually black.), and no forehead protectors or headgear on. Hidan and Itachi where now in the room also.

" Itachi and Hidan have told me you two have been acting very odd lately. What is the matter with you two?" He asked looking at Kisame, and then Kakuzu. Then, he continued to stare a Kakuzu noticing, his cheeks where turning an odd greenish color. Then, he began to shake. He was also breathing harder.

"Um…. Kakuzu.. Are you oka-" before he could finish Kakuzu run off, leaving Kisame and the leader in a daze. Hidan fallowed him, unsure of what he'll find. He saw Kakuzu run into the bathroom. He heard a sickening notice. The sound of someone throwing up. Hidan swallowed hard, and softly knocked on the softly.

"Kakuzu, you okay…"

"…"

"…"

"Kakuzu?" he asked again.

The door opened, Kakuzu emerged, his face was wet and he was still green and shaking. Hidan had never seen Kakuzu like this, he was actually scared. Kakuzu stared to make his way back to the leader's room, still shaking, and blaming Kisame for the state he was in.

Meanwhile…

Kisame swallowed hard, he didn't know what was wrong with Kakuzu.

'Did I hurt him, is he okay…' Kisame asked himself. At that very moment, Kakuzu and Hidan walked back into the room.

"Is he okay?" asked the lead.

"No, hes not, he just throw up." Hidan told the leader. Kisame's heart skipped a beat then, did he make Kakuzu sick, Kisame felt his mind say yes.

"So, what the hell is wrong!?" asked the leader. Kisame sighed, and Kakuzu gulped. Kisame looked a Kakuzu, a serious look on his face.

"We have to tell them," he muttered.

"ARE YOU FUCKN' INSANE!! They chow us up and shit us out!"

"But, they could help you, whatever is wrong with you, I will fix it, even if my reputation is shattered." Kisame responded.

Kisame sighed again. Kakuzu just shot him that same glare.

"One thing, get Konan please, I need to come clean about this." Kisame asked.

When Konan arrived, Kisame began to speak again.

"About a month ago, when you guys went to go celebrate capturing the Shakaku," Kisame gulped.

"Me and Kakuzu had a 12 pack beer, and we each had six, and had gotten intoxicated, and we, um… w-we… w-well, Kakuzu, you gonna say it?"

" HELL NO! GET ON WITH IT!"

" We had s-se-"

"OH MY FUCHN' JASHIN!!"- Hidan

"HOLY SHIT!"- Itachi  
"WTF!"-Konan

"OMFG!"- Leader

(XD XD LOLOLOLOL LMAO!)

Kisame waited for Konan to slap him and say it's over, but she just hugged him and cried.

" I can't stay mad at you, no matter what. I love you." She said.

Itachi and Hidan where knocked out on the floor, and Kakuzu trying to wake them up, while the leader said," I need a drink…" and walked away.

" That went better then I thought," Kakuzu said.

"Yeah, me too." Said Kisame.

Okay, that was funny huh!

Kisame: Why do you put me through hell?

Me: Because I WUVS you soooooo much!

XD Next time:

Kakuzu takes the test of DOOM!!

MUHAHAHA!


	5. Tsunde's test of doom!

Hey, WAZZZZZZZZ UPPPPPPPPPP

Hey, WAZZZZZZZZ UPPPPPPPPPP! Anyway, this is the main chapter, where Kakuzu take, gulp the Test… **lighting flashes ****all right, lets GO!**

**--MUHAHAHA! Kakuzu takes Tsunde's test of DOOM! --**

**An hour later, Kakuzu is still feeling bad; he decides to go in the garden for some fresh air. It didn't help, he throw up in the bushes. He walked back into the hideout; he gave a long hard sigh. He was walking by Kisame's room, he heard, music, as usually, but it was one of his favorite songs, Rockit, by the Gorillaz. It had a beat, the sounded like he was feeling right. He heard Kisame singing, Kisame had a wonderful voice, and all the akatsuki members rather liked his voice. **

" **I didn't mean to do it, it locked me in my head, I tried to be a charmer, but got a bit hopeless instead, the world is very sexy its part of my collapse,"**

"**Kakuzu," he heard a voice say, he turned around, and it was Diedara.**

"**Your turn to get groceries, UN."**

"**Um…Kay, you've got da money for da groceries?" he said in Will Smith sarcasm. **

"**Yeah." **

"**Oh… okay."**

'**It be good for me to get outta here anyway' he thought to himself. **

**--At the food lion--**

"**Good I have everything," he said. He was making he was making his way to the counter, cutting throw the woman's isle, and walked past something that caught his black and green eyes. He read the label out loud: **

"**Lady Tsunade's pregnancy test of doom, 150 correct. Why would she call it that?"**

**He sigh and wondered if he was, no! Only a few men in his clan had that trait, but could he have it too? He put it in the cart and continued as the people in the store stared at him. **

**--Back to the hideout! --**

**Kakuzu walked into the bathroom, he ran his hand thought his hair. He was scared. Without thinking he called a random name,**

"**Hidan! Hidan!"**

"**What!"**

"**Can you come here…I-I um? I need your help with something."**

**Hidan walked around the corner to see what was wrong.**

"**What is it…" he saw Kakuzu with the pregnancy test. He gave a twitch, and said**

" **Kakuzu, you're a woman…"**

" **No, it's a rare trait that anyone in my clan could have gotten. I just wanna make sure. I need someone thought."**

"**Um… Okay, I'm here for ya pal…" **

' **Oh my Jashin, were being nice to each other.'**

**As Kakuzu did what the test told him too, Hidan looked away, not wanting to Kakuzu pee.**

" **Yuck." He said. **

**Kakuzu turned away from the test while it was working he couldn't look. He heard three beeps. He turned cold.**

" **H-Hidan, w-what's it say?"**

**Hidan gulped.**

"**Positive."**

**Wow, that made me cry;; anyway next time:**

**Kisame, you're a father of two!**


	6. Its always cloudly, look into the past

Okay, Here goes nothin'

Okay, Here goes nothin'. Rahab's Rehab helped me with this one. Um… so heres a little something about Kakuzu's past.

--

"Wow, so a rare clan trait," Hidan asked, he was sitting on Kakuzu's bed while Kakuzu kept pacing around the room, thinking of what to do after he kills Kisame.

"Um… yeah if I remember correctly, I leaned about it when I was around 12."

"How old are you now?"

"89, 90, I dunno." He responded

"Wow your old." Hidan said

"Not to my clan, to them, I'm in my mid twenties."

"Okay… So are you gonna get rid of it?"

" What?"

"Ya know give it up for adoption, get an abortion or something."

"NO! Not since what happen to my unborn sibling."

--FLASH BACK! --

"Mama! Pop! I'm going ou-" a young 10 year old Kakuzu yelled but was stopped when he heard his parents talk about his new sibling.

"We can't afford another baby, I mean, we haven't be on a mission in mouths and we have to put Kakuzu through training everyday. It'll just be a waste of time." He heard his mother say.

"So what are me going to do?"

" We have no choice, I have to get an abortion. Its the on-"

"NO! Don't get rid of the baby Ma! I'll give up train if I have to, but don't-"

" Kakuzu! You have no say in this! I'm sorry, but if we want you to become a strong ninja and raise your own family." His father said

"No, you can't do that!"

"YES WE CAN! NOW SHUT THE HELL UP AND GET OUT OF OUR SITES!" His father yelled.

Kakuzu felt tear pouring through his eyes. His father just glared at him, while his mother was in complete shock.

"I HATE YOU!" He yelled as he ran out of the front door.

His father felt a filling of dread after that day. But, there plans continued.

--Flash back over--

" Oh, I see, poor little guy… Sorry." Hidan said.

" Its not your fault. I would never do what my parents did. Listen, I'd better get some rest and all do you wanna come back tomorrow and help my tell Kisame. Please?"

Hidan sighed; he was trying to be nice right now, Kakuzu looked like a nerves wreck.

"Um… okay, just do me a favor and get some rest."

"Kay, um…night."

"Good night."

Hidan shut the door behind him.

'This is bad, very bad.' He said to himself before walking to his room.

Meanwhile Kakuzu was in his bed, thinking about the day his parents told him about the trait.

--Yes! Another flash back! --

"Kakuzu! Hurry up!" his mother semi yelled at him.

"Coming mum'!" He said trying to keep up with his parents, they all had just finished a mission together and was now going past their clan's hospital.

"Mama, Pop! I wanna go in the hospital." Asked the twelve year old.

" What, um… maybe later Kuzu." His mother replied

"Please, if I'm gonna be one of the clan leaders someday, I have to know everything, even about our clan's medical attention."

"He's right, lets leave our bags by the door and show him around." His father spoke and as he said, they left there bags and where heading into the hospital. About half way through their tour, Kakuzu started to hear, screams, a man was screaming somewhere. He fallowed the odd sound into a room, by then the screaming was over. He stared into the room, then, looked wide-eyed at what he saw. His mother saw him and slapped her hand over his face.

"WHAT IN THE FU-" His mother slapped the back of his head.

" Don't be rude." She said

" Yes, and this is the rare trait that could just be inside you," his father said.

" What, I never knew about this. How is it? I mean…"

" Well in some rare cases, men in our family are born with the ability to have children."

"But dad, when me, you, and mom talked about sex, you said 'there is a man and a women.' So how does the man get pregnant?"

"Um… when you're older I'll tell you, but NOT now."

"Um…okay." He peered into the room again only to see a clan's member sweaty and tired holding a newborn baby.

Kakuzu sighed, and just as Hidan said, he got some rest.

--

That was longer the usual. Okay, just want to say thank you to Rahab's rehab for helpn' me out with this one and Hidan's worship girl for keeping faithful to the story. I will update soon! OWO


	7. We all need drinks

Kay, this one is a little um… random

Kay, this one is a little um… random. But I'm winging it! And doing my best.

Hope you guys like this one.

Kakuzu woke up, it was, 2 in the morning, and he had to throw up again. He got up and walked into the bathroom, did what he had to do and went back into his room. But, he couldn't sleep, he was thinking about the baby.

'Would Kisame want it? Or would he just take care Konan and the other baby and leave us in the dust.'

Kakuzu kept on thinking, he just couldn't sleep, he was too worried.

--The next morning --

Kakuzu woke up, someone knocking on the door. He wasn't feeling to good so he just asked who ever it was to come in.

" Kakuzu, you okay?" asked Hidan, still doing his best to be nice.

" No, I don't feel my best, I think I should get some more sleep."

"Oh okay…"

" Hidan listen, can you um… I dunno how to ask you this but…"

Hidan looked at Kakuzu and raised his eyebrows, wondering what he wanted him to do.

" Can you tell Kisame?"

"W-What?" Hidan asked.

" I can't right now, I have to much stuff on my mind, and, I don't feel good, just please?"

Hidan sighed.

" But, Kakuzu," he said softly.

" He needs to hear it from you."

"… Just do it"

" Okay." Hidan muttered.

"I'll bring you breakfast later." He said as he walk out the room and quietly shut the door. Hidan was unsure of this. But, he will tell Kisame, for Kakuzu.

After about an hour of searching Hidan realized Kisame was in the first place he should have looked, the pool.

"Finally! I've been fuckn' lookn'n for you all damn day!" Hidan yell. Kisame just looked up at the albino (he's still in the pool.) with on eyebrow raised.

" Listen this is important get out of the pool." Kisame just did as he asked grabbed his towel and got out of the pool. Then Hidan told Kisame about Kakuzu's trait. Kisame didn't get it at first thou. He thought it was a joke.

"Kisame I'm serious. Go asked Kakuzu, he'll tell you, he even took Tsunade's test of doom."

" You mean the same test Konan Chan did."

" Yes…"

Kisame stayed silent, he know then it was true. He felt tears in his eyes begin to water. Without anytime to waste, he run off into his room, took a shower and got his clothes on and run into Kakuzu's room. He knocked on the door, once again, waking poor a Kakuzu up.

' I'm feeling a little better, maybe I'll get up now.' He said to himself. He opened the door, it was Kisame.

" W-What are you-"

" We need to talk." Kisame just said, a serious look on his face.

" But I can ex-"

" Its not about that its about the baby."

" Well that's your fault! You wore the one who got me knocked up!"

" No, were not gonna give it up, I know you want to but-"

" I feel the same way. I don't wanna give it up."

" Good, um… that's odd coming from you."

" Yeah I-"

" Hey Kisa-Kun!" Konan interrupted.

" Konan I've got to tell you something."

The leader was walking by and heard it also.

" I needa another drink."

" Me, too" Kakuzu said

" Me, Three" Konan said

" Me, six." Kisame said.

Well that's it. Not the story but the chapter. TTFN.


End file.
